Parents, Take Control.
Kenny Luck is the Founder and President of Every Man Ministries. His enthusiasm for God and life is contagious, as is the zeal that sustained him through a wide range of achievements. He is the men's Pastor and leads the Men's Interactive Bible Study at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, where he serves as a member of the teaching staff. [Go to Every Man Ministries]
Several recent studies have shown that young children are often accidentally exposed to online pornography. More than pervasive, online pornography, with its pop-up advertising and maliciously-tagged images, has become invasive.
There is no way to avoid the statistics. Pornography is impacting a huge percentage of "good Christian families" all around the world. As well, due to the added weight of the guilt, secrecy, and shame that Christian kids feel around this issue, the problem can spiral downward quickly without the parents being aware. An occasional habit of viewing porn online can become an addiction to porn in no time.
If your son or daughter needs help for Internet pornography addiction, here are some steps you can take:
START WITH YOU.
Is there any pornography in the home? Are you or your spouse looking at Internet pornography or do you have any pornographic videos or magazines? Are you or your spouse watching inappropriate sexually charged movies in the home? Even if you think your kids will never find out – all pornography should be removed from the home immediately.
Next comes the hard part. Initiate a conversation with your son or daughter. Take some time to listen and create a nonjudgmental environment for him or her to open up to you. The X3pure classes provide a lot of useful examples of this.
Take time to watch your son’s or daughter’s online behavior. Look at what sites he or she is viewing. Check out the Internet History list on all computers. Is he or she using file sharing or P2P applications? Do a search on your computer for images or videos and see what you find.
Sometimes finding “nothing” is actually an indication of troubling behavior. When History and Temporary folders are repeatedly deleted the user may be hiding an Internet pornography addiction.
If you determine that your son or daughter is struggling with pornography, then act. The good news is that you have many options: a Christian counselor, your church, and of course X3pure online workshops. Consider taking them together to renew your bond in each other and in Christ.
Remember, you are the most effective weapon in dealing with pornography in your child’s life. Don’t be the parent that says:
"My son wouldn't look at nude pictures or videos on the web."
"My house is safe because we have filtered internet."
"My little angel only chats with friends online and would never talk to a stranger."
If you want to successfully deal with this problem in your home, it will require significant involvement in your kids' (Internet) lives–-including asking the tough questions, and discussing the dangers. We realize talking about pornography is just as hard as talking about sex, but it is time to get out of your comfort zone. Your kids are worth it.